WORDS CAN HURT OR HEAL

Anger is an emotion that quite often can make even the most logical of us into ranting creatures . Anger makes us lose our in-built radar . We flounder on our path and let fly with hurtful words . Words spoken in anger can wound , lacerate and leave emotional scars . They will linger in our psyche , sometimes for days and weeks . Childhood taunts burrow into our mind and they may reappear unexpectedly . Therefore , the pain caused by hurtful words is not easily forgetten or assuaged . There are some people who justify their hurtful words by saying , " SHE / HE NEEDS TO KNOW , I AM BEING BRUTALLY HONEST JUST FOR HER SAKE " . This is a very self-indulgent statement . Being "BRUTALLY HONEST" may actually focus on the brutality rather than the honesty . Curbing one's tounge is one life skill that everyone must work towards .
Paradoxically , people we love have the power to hurt us most . Family and close friends are the most vulnerable when it comes to being hurt . Those who are closest to us have the unfair advantage of knowing our weaknesses .
This intimate knowledge of our soft spots allows them to sometimes annihilate us with words .
Abuse need not be only physical . Verbal abuse is insidious but sure way of humiliating someone repeatedly . It can make one lose one's self-esteem . Verbal abuse does not only occur when someone is raising his or her voice . It can be a form of intimidation . It can be abusive just by constantly making fun of someone . Mean and harsh words could be used to control and manipulate .
When the verbal abuse first starts , it is important to reason with the other person and make them see that their words are hurtful . The important thing is not to cast oneself in the role of a victim .
This only encourages the other person to cause pain and to hurt you with their spiteful and wounding words . Like all forms of abuse , the perpetrator tries to excuse his behaviour by saying " SHE / HE DESERVED IT , SHE / HE IS MAKING ME DO THIS " .
Before we utter words that may inflict pain , it is important to take a deep breath and weigh our options . Letting go of our inhibitions and giving a person a piece of our mind may be momentarily satisfying but no amount of apologizing will take the relationship back to it's unflawed perfection .
There is no question that life is full of painful situations . It is within our realm of control to decide how much we are going to suffer . If someone is going to make your life miserable with constant verbal abuse , it is time to distance oneself from that person . It is important to protect your self-esteem and not let someone wear you down with judgemental and venomous words .
Loving and kind words are often more difficult to utter than thoughtless and cruel words . Everyday , you must look for an oppurtunity to brighten someone's life with a kind word . Children often remember the friend who stood by them when all the others were making fun of them . Similarly , kind and sympathetic words spoken from the heart can make the difference between bleak suffering and acceptance .
Forgiveness can place you firmly on the path to healing . The words " I FORGIVE YOU " can invest you with strength and courage to go on after pardoning the person who inflicted so much pain on you .